I wonder.....

and that is it! I wonder!

I wonder about so many things. I always have and I guess I always will, wonder.....

and one of the things that is intriguing me at the moment, is why do I always want to know more, do more, understand more?

I have spent the last few days with a fun-loving family, and since I live alone, that is already a difference for me. I have been watching all the interactions, and there is a part of me that YEARNS for the sense of rhythm and routine that surrounds the older couple, especially. They are only about 10 years older than me - not much, but it would seem they are from another era

I watched and listened. They know what they are going to do next week - the plans are made. They have a routine for breakfast in summer. the routine is different in winter, as they choose warmer, more filling food.

They do things together, they do things independently of one another;  but the rhythm remains constant. Dinner is at a certain time, preceded and followed by tea times or coffee times, at which point, there may be a nibble of either sweet or savoury nature.

I want this. I want a rhythm that is like a security blanket in my life. I am weary of always chasing after goals. I am different and although I loved this aspect of me in the past, there is something else emerging from within. the desire for more routine.

I want to be able to stop searching for the place where I belong. I want to arrive there, and know.....

I claim gentle this coming year.

2013 - all I really really really want is gentle ...soft and gentle and home

thank you.